A Stroll Along the Prom

Our New Year’s Day family dog walk did not go to plan whatsoever! We took 4 out of 5 kids out with the dog. What could possibly go wrong?! πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™€οΈ Well It was meltdown after meltdown but hey at least we tried. 😩😭🀯πŸ˜₯πŸ‘

Along the local Seafront 🌊 βš“οΈ we wander and so it begins πŸ™ˆ …….The TornadoπŸŒͺ has spotted the fountain ⛲️ far in the distance. He starts frantically pushing us in that direction. Damn it…..he had clearly remembered frolicking around in that same water fountain back in the summertime! Well that was it. He is still pretty much non-verbal (bar the odd word) He couldn’t understand why we weren’t able to go and get soggy again πŸ’¦. We try to attract his attention to a football and a kick about on the field but to no avail. Nope he wanted to go play in the flipping water. Bless him, he doesn’t know it’s minus 4 and bloody freezing ❄️ !! He is not taking no for an answer and keeps dragging us back towards it. BOOM! Meltdown number 1 is now in full swing. 😩

Next Bam Bam wanted a piece of the action (figure of speech of course he didn’t actually WANT to feel like this) πŸ™ƒ He had an almighty, inconsolable meltdown cause we tried to stop him running off in the opposite direction to where we were headed…..We thwarted his many attempts at a sprint away and had to admit defeat in the end and rugby tackled him back into the pushchair. Again the understanding is just not there yet, poor boy 😞 He goes on kicking and screaming for about 20mins, did his usual Houdini twist and got out of the pushchair harness several times ….FFS this is REALLY not going to plan. 😳

I’m beginning to wish we hadn’t spent 3 hours preparing to leave the house and maybe we should have just stayed in and watched The Sound Of Music (one of my faves) πŸŽΌβ›°

We try to divert any further attention from the public, we go to the chippy nearby. One of the bigger boys thinks he’s a joker and turns the shop sign to closed and people are actually reading it and walking off πŸ€¦πŸ»β€β™€οΈ Cheeky Git!! Panic stations there are no battered sausages left in the chippy ……Well that’s just fucking fantastic! Cue enormous meltdown number 2 from our Tornado πŸŒͺ. The importance of the battered sausage is imperative …. he is a very picky eater he basically only eats sausages, choc chip brioche, noodles and yoghurt, not a lot else. As many autistic people do, he has a real sensory issue with food.

“RIGHT enough is enough, Abandon family walk. I repeat abandon the family dog walk. It’s clearly not happening today πŸ™ˆ Get back to the minibus pronto” 🚌.

We pop to Tesco on the way home where I stay in the van with the kiddies and hubby pops in for supplies. Bam Bam is worn out and snoozing 😴 now and Tornado πŸŒͺ is a little fraught but a lot calmer now. Just randomly bashing his head on into my phone occasionally, cause it didn’t do what he wanted. I’m just sat in Tescos carpark in the middle of my van ….yodelling with Princess Pebbles

High on a hill was a lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Loud was the voice of the lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

I’m not crazy honest …we make our own fun and she was happily joining in (well sort of)! I’m quite animated with my singing and really get into it. Think passerby’s may have thought I had a screw loose but who cares? πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™€οΈπŸ˜†

Finally we arrive back home and Bam Bam wakes up removes ALL his clothes (another sensory thing) and commenced running and spinning round the lounge butt naked! πŸ‘ He doesn’t like clothes on him very much at all 😳 Would be ok if he was potty trained πŸ’¦πŸš½πŸ’©πŸ˜† Ah well at least he’s happy now 😊.

Tornado πŸŒͺ has also chilled his boots now and is watching Mario videos on repeat and Princess Pebbles πŸ‘ΈπŸ» is climbing the furniture like it’s her mission In life! I send Daddy Maddog off for a swift pint and the raffle I think he needs it after our stressful hour out!

Things other family’s take for granted are sometimes not so easy for us! A simple walk along the seafront turned into a chaotic sequence of events but it’s all good in the end. Anyway no use dwelling on it we draw a line under it and try again another day 😊.

Not much point to this post, other than me needing an outlet to write down how manic our life can be, trying to do ”normal family stuff. I guess we shouldn’t expect anything other than madness with my lot. After all we are far from normal πŸ€ͺ We are definitely not your average family ……

Till my next rant

Love L 😘 x

Desperately Seeking …..Sensory

I’m not one to moan (well alright, maybe just a little bit) πŸ™ƒBUT Wow these twinnies are hard work lately!! Me and Daddy Maddog are teetering on the brink of insanity….. so close to being pushed over the edge but somehow we survive, day by day!

All 5 of our kids are extremely Sensory Seeking! Whether it be verbal stimming, high pitch screaming, shouting or physical movement to express themselves. It might seem odd to an outsider but this is what they need to feel good. It’s their outlet so we need to let them carry out most of these actions, not try and stop them completely (within sensible reason of course).

With the little ones πŸ™ˆπŸ™‰πŸ™Š ….. the autistic traits are showing through loud and clear now. The constant repetitive actions and movements are wearing. Almost unbearable at times as both twins won’t take no for an answer. It is is disheartening and so bloody hard but their need to climb is relentless and ritualistic. Bam Bam’s favourite trick is shimmying over the babygate… quicker than a speeding bullet he’s off up the stairs or into the kitchen. We have to lock the front door as he tries to bolt and escape at every opportunity. He’s a clever little thing and grabs chairs or slides furniture to help him get to where he wants. He gets a leg up on the washing machine and next he’s walking along the kitchen counter emptying the cupboards or climbing inside the fridge. Pebble’s loves stomping around on the kitchen table (with one welly on) and even gets on top of the bureau!! Her favourite lately is climbing up to the tv (on the wall) using a shelf. Then standing up there trying to immerse herself into the picture.

All 3 little ones walk along the backs of the sofa along the window sills, radiators…balancing dangerously on the edge. Our kids have no sense of danger and just crave this constant motion.

We take them down from the high surfaces a million times a day (no word of a lie)!! Repeat the same thing NO but alas they are still non-verbal with no understanding or comprehension of how they could hurt themselves. Their need for sensory input from climbing or being on their head upside down is obsessional …. they need these movements to feel good and comfortable within themselves. From dusk til dawn (literally) 😴

Tornado πŸŒͺ has many meltdowns a day as He understandably likes his own space, away from the twins. He does interact and run about with them occasionally but only on his terms. He too likes to climb and move constantly from room to room and scaling the furniture etc but he’s not quite as intense as the twins right now.

For Christmas we are getting some equipment to kit out a sensory gym and Snoezelen/Multi sensory Room with lights chill out area.

Snoezelen or controlled multisensory environment (MSE) is a therapy for people with autism and other developmental disabilities, dementia or brain injury. It consists of placing the person in a soothing and stimulating environment, called the “Snoezelen room”. These rooms are specially designed to deliver stimuli to various senses, using lighting effects, color, sounds, music, scents, etc. The combination of different materials on a wall may be explored using tactile senses, and the floor may be adjusted to stimulate the sense of balance. 

We are hopefully setting this up in our garage eventually. It’s gonna take some doing cause the garage is full to the brim with crap but will be my project for 2020.

We’d love to kit out a proper therapy room to benefit all 5 kids. I’m talking crash mats, soft play, climbing equipment, indoor trampoline, ball pit, balance beams, spinning/rocking toys and climbing walls, lights, mirrors, fibre optics etc. The works! They deserve it!

This room will help improve our stress levels and help the all of the kids development and sensory needs, even the bigger ones. It will help us manage the behaviours and give them somewhere to focus this energy on and let them climb, balance, hang upside down, spin SAFELY to their hearts content!

However this equipment does not come cheap, especially the lights and effects stuff. Although we have some items arriving as gifts for Xmas. To make this a perfect sensory environment it’s going to take time and a lot more dosh! But the end result will be so worth it and really beneficial to our kiddies development and wellbeing 😊.

Ok so this might be a little bit cheeky but if you don’t ask you don’t get, right?!…….

We decided we might try some fundraising for our little monkeys to help make this happen. We are thinking of starting up a Mad Madden’s Crowdfunding campaign after Christmas! I’m not gonna beg constantly but would be enormously grateful if anyone could donate to our fund, even a couple of pounds would be amazing! Every little helps as they say. πŸ˜‰

Thank you for reading and well done if you got through the whole post lol πŸ€ͺ You know I love a good rant!

Till next time

Love L 😘 x

Clap, flap, spin and bounce!

Calm After the Storm

The Meltdown

The sadder side of autism is the frustration and lack of understanding of their own feelings and emotions. Ladies and gentlemen we have the extreme meltdown. Not just a naughty child just having a paddy. I’m talking an uncontrollable meltdown of epic proportions!! 😩

It is a barrage of pent up emotions all fizzed up inside and exploding like fireworks, screaming 10 x as loud but not as pretty.

I watched as the meltdown unfolded….it emerged from the depths of my child almost out of nowhere. All of a sudden BOOM! ✴️ It explodes and Woah Mumma ….this one is a right corker! I am holding back the tears trying to regain some control but I can’t. After an hour of this, with no sign of relenting, I am pushed to the brink of insanity telling myself β€œIt’ll all be good, just give him time to get through it”. However It’s too late for cuddles, distractions, songs, funny anecdotes and silly faces etc. These methods sometimes work to nip It in the bud before it reaches a crescendo. Not this time, it’s too far gone for that. The boy is in full throttle with an huge emotional outburst he and I are not quite sure how to deal with it…..We are at the point of no return and there’s no looking back.😭

The screaming squawking, self harming, head butting, scratching and lashing out is heart wrenching to experience and all I can do is try and keep him safe. Sometimes I get caught in the backlash maybe a slap to the face or a punch but I don’t mind, it’s not intentional or malicious and the priority is his safety and welfare.

The expression on his face is pure sadness, pain and frustration. The emotional turmoil he is in upsets me more than words can explain. I can’t help him, I can’t stop these feelings upsetting him…he is immersed within this unpleasant whirlwind and doesn’t know how to cope 😒. All I can do is just be there beside him, not too close yet not leaving him completely alone … just there. ❀️ We simply have to ride out the storm together and wait for calm or exhaustion (whichever comes first)

The Aftermath

Now a few hours later I watch him sleep. My beautiful boy, so peaceful after the awful happenings of earlier. Luckily he will wake up and not remember a thing about this. He will carry on being his normal happy, cheeky self, so that is some blessing.

I’m shattered and keep getting flashbacks of how distressing this particular episode was for all BUT we survived and came out the other side as we always do. x πŸ’™πŸ’ͺ🏻😒😊 #autism #asd #awareness #motherslove #wearestrong #warriors #meltdown #nonverbal #feelings #parenting #blogger #sensoryoverload