10 Things that are no longer cool when youโ€™re a 40+ Mum (apparently)

1- Trying to keep up with the latest dance craze for example The Dab, Whip Ney Ney, The Floss

2- Attempting to make sense of games like Fornite, Roblox, COD etc I prefer a good old fashioned Mario game on the Super Nintendo me! lol #oldskool

3- Singing and dancing in public to embarrass your kids (tbh this was never actually a cool mum thing to do but ……it’s just so funny to wind them up ๐Ÿคฃ) Nursery rhymes, made up songs, musicals and of course annoying baby shark at the top of my voice ๐Ÿ‘

4- Writing text abbreviations (and sometimes forgetting what they actually mean) trying get down with the kids ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ

5- Getting tipsy drunk and dancing to a party action song such as the birdie song, cha-cha slide, Macarena etc Not really acceptable as cool Mum behaviour any age but I still like to participate in any case…even if I’m sober Lol One thing I find as I get older, I really don’t give a shit what people think ๐Ÿ˜Š. Also on special occasions, I like shaking my bum in a club like I’m freakin’ Shakira …My child bearing ‘Hips Don’t Lie’

6- Peeking over the top of your spectacles and squinting to look at someone. Also wearing glasses on those necklace thingys …. never cool but very practical!

7- When you no longer recognise some of the youngsters music and have to switch radio stations. Bye bye Capital FM hello Radio 2 lol

8- Talking about pooh size, shape, frequency, consistency is not cool but I can’t promise I won’t do this ….. most of my blog posts involve talking about baby plop๐Ÿ’ฉ

9- Wearing thong knickers….. Not for me anyway. Nowadays it’s like a bit of cheese wire cutting into ya cheeks! Nope since birthing 5 kids my fanny needs a break and no chaffing going on down there!! ๐Ÿ˜ณ Its Bridget Jones granny ‘ comfy’ knickers all day long for me. (Soz probably TMI)

10- Saying things to the kids such as “Back in my day such and such happened”

“Less of the cheek or I’ll give you a clip round the ear hole”,

“Chop, chop hurry up”

And my personal fave “Up the wooden hill”

I guess I’m not really all that cool then? ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿค”๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚ Ah well at least I’m a little bit funny sometimes though! ๐Ÿคช

That’s all for now folks!

Lotsa love L ๐Ÿ˜˜ x

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Grappling Twins ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป

Watching my 2 youngest offspring rolling around the floor grappling with each other like some kind of ‘no holds barred’ WWF Wresting match ….. there’s eye poking, ear twisting, hair pulling. ๐Ÿ™Š I’m telling Albert “no” to him pulling his sisters tuft of hair for the umpteenth time this morning. He looks at me a smiles cheekily and does it twice as hard, grinning like a Cheshire Cat! ๐Ÿ˜บLittle git!!

Mind you Annie does give as good as she gets back to him to be fair. They trample (crawl) over each other so intent on reaching the closet bit of furniture. Yes, both twinnies are fully mobile and on the move now. Both crawling at speed, usually in opposite directions ๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ We have a baby gate at every door, which I’ve swiftly learnt to scissor kick over the top (can’t open the bloody gate with 2 bubbas hanging onto the other side, looking like they’re in baby jail!) The Tornado ๐ŸŒช also loiters around the gate and gets his leg stuck in between the bars 101 times a day!!

Albert is walking proficiently round the furniture (coasting). Also standing up and even letting go momentarily. He’s practicing going up then down and laughing cause he’s plotting what mischief he can get into. He can do the whole flight of stairs too! ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

Annie has got the crawling down to a fine art now and she can get on her feet whilst touching her toes. She sits perfectly straight up with her legs in the splits….. like a little ballerina doing her stretches. However then she spoils the ambiance of being lady like by rolling over with her legs still a Kimber and farting in a not very graceful fashion!! ….Yeah yeah I know just like her mummy!!๐Ÿ™Š

Even though we’re almost 9 months in I still stop and think WOW I have twins I made these perfect little bundles …. it STILL has not sunk in completely. Life has been such a blur of shitty nappies, teething, baby puke, sleepless nights, messy weaning and most importantly survival.

These kids amaze me everyday, as do the other 3. ๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’–

I wonder what it will be like in a couple more months when I have 3 under 3 literally running around, disobeying orders and causing havoc!!

I look forward to seeing what trouble the three of them will cause together?!!๐Ÿคฆ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿคฃ

Time to employ NanneeMcPhee maybe?

Lots of love

L x